Whichever word that you prefer, the meaning to almost the same; not moving, stagnant. This is the condition of my mind now, my physical situation as well. And it has lasted almost a month now. I tried and tried to find the answer, but it keeps eluding me.
Every now and then we should take a break, stop all we are doing and let time for a little re-evaluation, re-assessment, re-connect, whatever you may call it, the word here is RE. We re-visit our very own core of existence, the very reason why we are where we are now .. in others words not to allow ourselves to went astray !
Do you or have you ever stop and re-visit your root ? The very reason why you are doing what you are doing now ? Are you on the right track ? Are you doing what your heart tells you to do ? or your mind insists of doing ? Most the time alot among us are doing things that we might not want to do, but we have to do. The choice is always ours to make and if it turns out bad, we have the responsibility to accept it.
I constantly keep myself align, so that I do things with my heart and passion. That way, I am being true to my heart and my responsibility towards my work and myself. Being real ! And to always stay real and passionate so that the flames keep burning and continue to burn. I am always a survivor and I do believe victory belongs to the most persevere. Because life is no matter how much you have to endure, you must come out unspoiled of it.
At which juncture, where are you now ?
Saturday, May 8, 2010
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
nature's food chain ...
I was watching travel & living on Astro and to my horrible surprise ignorant series "Getaway" feature a clip of the host feeding the Trevally fish on one of the island in Australia.
I always oppose to the idea of feeding animals be it on land or in the water. Animals have their own way of finding food, unless they are injure and are unable to hunt for food. then we lend a helping hand while they re-habilitate. And not intentiously feeding them. By feeding these animals they will become domesticated and they break the food chain. Everything, be it on land or in the in the water, have a big food chain of its own. The moment we break one part it is doom and will soon comes back to us human which is also a part of the food chain. Why do we human resolve to feeding them just to impress the tourist in US ? I also echo my favourite author, put down the tag "Save the Earth" instead educate human first !
The next time you travel .. PLEASE CONSIDER responsibly and respecting the environment, DO NOT ENCOURAGE your guide to feeding of animals. And do not break the food chain, just like the earth is telling us that we are doing so much of harm to it that it is giving us hints daily with earthquake to reminds us !!
Shark feeding ... THINK what if the shark mistaken the toe as the fish ?? I really hope it will .. so that human will learn the lesson the bitter way !
I always oppose to the idea of feeding animals be it on land or in the water. Animals have their own way of finding food, unless they are injure and are unable to hunt for food. then we lend a helping hand while they re-habilitate. And not intentiously feeding them. By feeding these animals they will become domesticated and they break the food chain. Everything, be it on land or in the in the water, have a big food chain of its own. The moment we break one part it is doom and will soon comes back to us human which is also a part of the food chain. Why do we human resolve to feeding them just to impress the tourist in US ? I also echo my favourite author, put down the tag "Save the Earth" instead educate human first !
The next time you travel .. PLEASE CONSIDER responsibly and respecting the environment, DO NOT ENCOURAGE your guide to feeding of animals. And do not break the food chain, just like the earth is telling us that we are doing so much of harm to it that it is giving us hints daily with earthquake to reminds us !!
Shark feeding ... THINK what if the shark mistaken the toe as the fish ?? I really hope it will .. so that human will learn the lesson the bitter way !
Monday, March 29, 2010
the people or the elite bunch ?
Recently I have been following on some politics from around; Bangkok, KL or even US.
Politics are so corrupt and it is not the most healthiest to practise especially in office and within groups of friends. But without it between governments and countries will not function well.
I am following it to for the sake of seeing how people change and fluctuates when comes to serving their country and its citizens. I see only the surface as I am no insider about who is who or whom is gang up with whom and what strategy to each is applying in the arts of war !
I stress my points that politicians or member of parliaments are all elected by people; people from the street, people who are real and living in that country. A lot of times politicians fail to see that they are being elected by the locals to voice out their grievances in the parliament, MP's are the people's voice !
I am citing example in Thailand, I see the real people, the poor are seeking a person who gives them a better life, a person whom had built the country's economy from bad to good during the crisis in 1998. But all is forgotten as he is not friendly with a certain elite group. So who should an MP or politician serve ? The people or the elite ?
Same goes to our current situation in MCA, a local race base political party. Its current past President had taken the bull by the horn to address reform and change within the association to make it relevant to the people. But instead he stir the elite's hornet and got himself into trouble for doing so; polls still suggest that he is the people's choice ! Again who should the president serve ? the people or the elite ?
it is sad that the general public is being ignored but it will not be long when the People Power rises again. A country is a country when there are citizens and people will only want to live in it when they know it is save and provides them with security and food ! When the border line is crossed and its people fell threaten, human as in any being will retreat and resist, will retaliate and rebel !
So in a country or organisation who will be the main backbone; the people or the elites; the work force or the managers ?
Politics are so corrupt and it is not the most healthiest to practise especially in office and within groups of friends. But without it between governments and countries will not function well.
I am following it to for the sake of seeing how people change and fluctuates when comes to serving their country and its citizens. I see only the surface as I am no insider about who is who or whom is gang up with whom and what strategy to each is applying in the arts of war !
I stress my points that politicians or member of parliaments are all elected by people; people from the street, people who are real and living in that country. A lot of times politicians fail to see that they are being elected by the locals to voice out their grievances in the parliament, MP's are the people's voice !
I am citing example in Thailand, I see the real people, the poor are seeking a person who gives them a better life, a person whom had built the country's economy from bad to good during the crisis in 1998. But all is forgotten as he is not friendly with a certain elite group. So who should an MP or politician serve ? The people or the elite ?
Same goes to our current situation in MCA, a local race base political party. Its current past President had taken the bull by the horn to address reform and change within the association to make it relevant to the people. But instead he stir the elite's hornet and got himself into trouble for doing so; polls still suggest that he is the people's choice ! Again who should the president serve ? the people or the elite ?
it is sad that the general public is being ignored but it will not be long when the People Power rises again. A country is a country when there are citizens and people will only want to live in it when they know it is save and provides them with security and food ! When the border line is crossed and its people fell threaten, human as in any being will retreat and resist, will retaliate and rebel !
So in a country or organisation who will be the main backbone; the people or the elites; the work force or the managers ?
Sunday, March 28, 2010
The edge ... and back !
My hearts is feeling a little pain, its hurting me. 2 more days to full moon, the bright lights shining from the windows again captures my attention. Can never resist the beauty of it, in the middle of the nights when the whole world is slowing down, its residence is, in this part of the globe is resting. The almost full moon is when I will always be reminded of one person. I will miss her a lot. And it hurts a lot too. I hope that she had found peace with herself and allows love to flow in to her and not let things passes by.
It pinch into your heart fiercely when you know that someone you love dearly is not responding to you, and refusing to let love flow in. It hurts everyone when the one refuses to let the flow flow freely. But as it is supposed to be, universe have its own way and there is a process that we all need to go through instead of rushing in to process it. Time …
The full moon will always be my reminder of this person whom had come into my life as reminder. Reminding me about soul mate, reminding me about now. It was a very intense 3 months , it had been a period of intensity to the maximum and had me once again all worn out. I am tire and it almost push me to the edge.
Life is as always a process and a world classroom that provides us with so much of lessons and teachings to seek the better of whom we are. With each lessons and hints from the universe we hope to change ourselves to become whom we seek out to be.
I will always think of you ‘little finger’, the fullmoon will be my reminder !
Sunday, March 21, 2010
shock ...
While I was in Jakarta attending DEEP & EXTREME Indonesia as a buyer, I was shock to know of 2 death on the same day, within the same hour. Though non of the deceased are close to me but it is shocking enough that the last I met them is last year July in KL. One is a young man; hard working and nice, the other is someone new not too acquainted but still was a shock as he is healthy looking.
For a moment during the table talk buyer meet sellers session, I was taken aback. Their leaving had me stop for a moment. Life could be just like that and very often its just like that. But yeah like Rantje says life goes on, it happens everyday. But I was really taken a back, Zain of Dive Indonesia and Svein of Siladen.
I do understand that we must appreciate what we have now and cherish whom we have now. But sometimes things cannot be hurried. There's always a process to follow, to speed up the process will make matters worse if not worsen what it already is. Sometimes I want to just rush in, but very often we can not do just that. The process must be follow. If its not time yet, we have to wait and be patience.
I hope their soul will rest in peace and I am sadden that I do not have the chance to do business with Zain at all. He is hardworking and energetic ! Too pre-mature to end his journey.
For a moment during the table talk buyer meet sellers session, I was taken aback. Their leaving had me stop for a moment. Life could be just like that and very often its just like that. But yeah like Rantje says life goes on, it happens everyday. But I was really taken a back, Zain of Dive Indonesia and Svein of Siladen.
I do understand that we must appreciate what we have now and cherish whom we have now. But sometimes things cannot be hurried. There's always a process to follow, to speed up the process will make matters worse if not worsen what it already is. Sometimes I want to just rush in, but very often we can not do just that. The process must be follow. If its not time yet, we have to wait and be patience.
I hope their soul will rest in peace and I am sadden that I do not have the chance to do business with Zain at all. He is hardworking and energetic ! Too pre-mature to end his journey.
Friday, March 19, 2010
lost and found
* this post was created on 27th February 2010; somehow I almost forgot about it until now.
Yesterday I was so happy I found back a pendant that I thought was lost. It was a black colored heart shape pendant made of a kind of stone that I bought from Kwai, Thailand. And also at the same time ALL my contacts in my new phone was lost when I did a sync with my laptop. And in there was a contact that I most wanted to keep, a person's contact that I still want to keep close to my heart as I know that we have not close the chapter yet. and while transferring the contacts I manage to retrieve the number from my sim card, I found again.
That feeling of lost and found, makes me treasures it more now. This pendant is of black color which is consider a bad luck color what more its a heart shape pendant in black, my Mom do not like it at all. But I kept it. Deep in my heart, I thought that Mom had throw my pendant away. She did it once with my one of the orang utan I brought back from a dive show. I was angry and did not talk to her for a few days. So when she says that she don't like this pendant and it got missing. I thought she throw it away again. But NO, it was hidden in a corner in my closet. But why is it there ? I have no idea. And when I saw that pendant, I was like ... guilty, happy and sad ! Guilty of accusing my Mom of throwing it away ( though I only realise of it's missing last year when Mom already passed away) happy because I really like the pendant. Sad because Mom won't be able to see that I am always going against her will, the rebellious one.
Only when we realise that we have lost that we will know how much we value it. SO when it is found back, we know we are given a second chance to appreciate it more.
How often we are given that second chance ?
Yesterday I was so happy I found back a pendant that I thought was lost. It was a black colored heart shape pendant made of a kind of stone that I bought from Kwai, Thailand. And also at the same time ALL my contacts in my new phone was lost when I did a sync with my laptop. And in there was a contact that I most wanted to keep, a person's contact that I still want to keep close to my heart as I know that we have not close the chapter yet. and while transferring the contacts I manage to retrieve the number from my sim card, I found again.
That feeling of lost and found, makes me treasures it more now. This pendant is of black color which is consider a bad luck color what more its a heart shape pendant in black, my Mom do not like it at all. But I kept it. Deep in my heart, I thought that Mom had throw my pendant away. She did it once with my one of the orang utan I brought back from a dive show. I was angry and did not talk to her for a few days. So when she says that she don't like this pendant and it got missing. I thought she throw it away again. But NO, it was hidden in a corner in my closet. But why is it there ? I have no idea. And when I saw that pendant, I was like ... guilty, happy and sad ! Guilty of accusing my Mom of throwing it away ( though I only realise of it's missing last year when Mom already passed away) happy because I really like the pendant. Sad because Mom won't be able to see that I am always going against her will, the rebellious one.
Only when we realise that we have lost that we will know how much we value it. SO when it is found back, we know we are given a second chance to appreciate it more.
How often we are given that second chance ?
Thursday, March 18, 2010
finally .. I have been to Bali !
After 8 years, I first came to Bali in 2002 a month after the first Bali bomb, I have not the chance to visit Tanah Lot. The past 8 years I have visited Bali more then 6 times, and every time I was either staying in Ubud or Candidasa or too short trips.
Today finally Kadek Andi opens up my interest to visit Tanah Lot while transferin me from Alam Asmara to Kuta. He offer to transfer me to Tanah Lot just a short de-tour. I hesitated but was thinking since I have nothing to do in Kuta might as well go. He was telling me that there was a saying by Java resident that to come to Bali without going to Tanah Lot is like not having been to Bali at all. So for me finally, I have been to Bali ! But I can’t go into the temple because I was having my menstruation and sacred places of worship are forbidden. So I guess I have to save it for my next visit.
Finally, I can say I have been to Bali now; Tanah Lot, I remember seeing a picture of my mom or dad taken in Tanah Lot when he is working in Surabaya in the older days. Now I am finally here.
I guess this is how the universe work sometimes, just when we did not expect it, we are given the chance to it. Just be patience and trust that it is on the way and the way will be lead to you. Be patience and have faith and trust that the message you sent out had been received and taken care of.
I am full, I am grateful and I feel blessed ! Finally my journey of Bali is complete. I hope to make it whole, please allow me to be whole and complete
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